Safety: What Kids Need from Their Parents
The world is full of hazards, so for a parent who wants to keep their children and teens safe, it can be difficult to know where to start. In this article, we divide the safety needs of children and teens into two categories: physical and emotional. Each section provides some practical things that you can do to provide security as a parent. From there, we will briefly touch on the hazards of overprotective parenting.
Providing Physical Safety for Children and Teens
You want your children and teens to be physically healthy and to live in a safe environment. It’s also important to help them learn how to deal with dangerous situations to the best of their ability. Here are some things that you can do to make these things possible.
Teach What’s Safe and Not Safe
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life. You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes; with your right hand you save me (Psalms 138:7).
God saves us from the hazards of this world in many ways. Sometimes, He intervenes by thwarting the plans of our enemies directly, and other times He provides us with wisdom so that we can do our best to avoid danger ourselves.
As a parent, you can pass the wisdom of God along to your children by letting them know what is safe and what is not safe. For example, it’s important to teach young children about the dangers of talking to strangers, and then when they get older, teach them about the hazards of the Online world.
It’s important to keep your discussions age-appropriate and update the conversation as their experience of the world expands.
Create Safety Plans
You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance (Psalms 32:7).
When we are going through difficulties and dangers, turning to God can provide us with solutions. As a parent, you do what you can to teach your children about safety, but there’s always the possibility of bad things happening anyway. That’s why it’s important to have a plan.
For starters, teach children how to dial 911 in case of an emergency. When they are able, teach them their phone number and address to make it easier for first responders to help.
You can also come up with plans for what to do if you become separated in a public space, fire safety practices, and teach them about local plants, bugs, and animals that can be dangerous—just to name a few. Take some time to think about this topic and how to talk about safety with your children and teens on their level.
Provide for Their Physical Needs
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).
As children of God, we trust in Him to provide everything that we need. Your children should be able to count on you to provide for them as well. Their physical needs include healthy meals, which can be challenging for picky eaters, but small changes overtime can make a big difference. This also includes weather-appropriate clothing, a sanitary home, and teaching about personal hygiene.
Providing Emotional Safety for Children and Teens
Safety goes beyond providing for physical needs. You also want to do your best to ensure that your children and teens are mentally and emotionally safe, especially when it comes to their relationship with you. Here’s what you can do to help make this happen.
Offer Reassurance
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God (Philippians 4:6).
It’s important to know that you can go to God with all your problems, and it’s also important that your children and teens can do the same with you. Help them feel safe by letting them know that you love them, and you’ll always be there to support them.
Avoid lecturing or other forms of critical talking, yelling, or using physical forms of punishment. Offer words of affirmation as much as possible, positive feedback, and ensure that the boundaries set in your home are upheld calmly and consistently.
Identify Comfort Places or Objects
The name of the Lord is a fortified tower; the righteous run to it and are safe (Proverbs 18:10).
God doesn’t leave us without safe places to turn to. In-fact, He is Himself a refuge for us. On top of being a place of safety for your children yourself, you can also help them to identify comfort places or objects that they can use to soothe their fears and anxieties.
For children, this might be a favorite stuffed animal or blanket. You can also designate a “calm down” spot for children that struggle with big emotions. Older children and teenagers might appreciate having a private journal to write in, or being allowed to retreat into their bedrooms for small spurts of time when they need to wind down.
Create a Stable Home Environment
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world (John 16:33).
When the world is dangerous and unpredictable, our relationship with God and the gospel of the Kingdom of Heaven reminds us that we have an eternal home of love and safety. Your children need that refuge, too. Their home should be a place that’s safe, and while bad things can happen no matter what you do, you can go a long way toward providing this for them.
For example, create a stable schedule, establish clear boundaries, and enforce discipline calmly and with love. You can also make home fun by providing your children and teens with access to a variety of activities that encourage them to hone their strengths and talents.
Overprotective Parenting Takes Safety Too Far
While keeping your children and teens safe is important, it is possible to take this too far.
Kids are going to get bumps and bruises as they explore the world around them. They are going to feel frustrated when they can’t master a task quickly, and they are going to get upset when asked to do things they don’t want to do. It’s important to give your kids the freedom to play, to have negative emotions as they learn, and to experience consequences for their actions.
Teens are going to make mistakes, go through phases as they get to know themselves, experience heartbreak, and venture out into the world. Finding the balance between giving your teens the space they need to mature while providing for their safety can be challenging, but it’s important to do your best to strike a healthy balance.
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With so much to consider when it comes to providing safety for your children and teens, it’s understandable if you feel a little overwhelmed by it all. If you could use some expert advice that’s tailored to the unique needs of your family, then there are Christian therapists in Raleigh that can help.
Sojourner Counseling is home to faith-based Christian counselors in Raleigh that offer a safe place for reflection, guidance, and growth for children, teens, and adults. Reach out to us anytime to learn more!