Learning How To Show Grace and Self-Compassion for Your Mistakes

Do you have a hard time letting go of your mistakes? Do you go over the details again and again, then find yourself consumed with regret or overwhelming feelings of shame? Do you beat yourself up over small things that you would never criticize other people over so harshly? As Christians, we know how important it is to show compassion and grace toward others, but it can be just as important to treat ourselves with the same kindness. 

Easier said than done, right? 

While it’s not so simple to just change your mind about yourself, there are some resources that can help. For example, Christian counselors in Raleigh, NC provide counseling for women, children, and teens who could use a helping hand with overcoming shame and a negative self-image. More on that below.

For now, let’s think about why it’s important to cut yourself a little slack, what the Bible says about self-compassion and some simple steps that you can take to treat yourself with more kindness. 

Why Grace and Self-Compassion Are Important

All of us fall short of perfection, so we might feel tempted at times to lose patience with ourselves. If this happens frequently, you might experience some serious, negative effects on your mental, physical, and spiritual health. 

These issues can present themselves in several ways, such as persistent low mood, anxiety, changes in eating habits, trouble sleeping, withdrawal from others, and more. Sound familiar? All the more reason to find freedom through the freeing power of grace!

What Does the Bible Say About This?

 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh, I serve the law of sin (Romans 7:19-25).

The above passage was written by the apostle Paul, one of the chief writers of the New Testament and founders of the Christian faith. Even he struggled with his inability to do the things he should do. 

The culprit of all mankind is sin, but the remedy is Jesus Christ. He understands the frailty of our natures, and He is here to forgive us, heal us, and help us work toward doing better over time—and all of these are acts of His grace.

Resting in the grace of God through Jesus Christ can help us show more grace and compassion for ourselves. As the scriptures say, “We are His workmanship,” and “nothing can separate us from the love of God.” This means He will work all things that need to be worked out. It’s our job to trust in Him, including His unwavering love for us.

Simple Steps Toward Treating Yourself with More Grace 

Even if you have an intellectual knowledge of God’s love for you, changing your heart toward yourself isn’t always so simple. It might feel strange and difficult to have self-compassion, especially if you are hard-wired to view all your mistakes, large and small, as serious offenses. 

While it takes time, and that is okay, there are some little things that you can do to work toward a healthier, faith-filled view of yourself:

• Role Reversal: Think of someone that you love a lot and put them in your place. What if they came to you saying the same things about themselves as you say to yourself? You would probably encourage them to go easier on themselves—and this means that you should, too. 
• Focus on the Good: This might feel unnatural if you are struggling with deep shame but try to think about some of your positive qualities. Better yet, write them down and read them anytime you are overwhelmed by negative self-talk. 
• Christian Counseling: Having a professional, faith-based counselor to talk to can help you unpack the reasons why you’re having trouble with self-compassion and provide you with some great tools for recovery. 

Find Help for Negative Self-Talk Through Christian Counseling in Raleigh, NC

If you could use some extra help letting go of your inner critic, then Christian counseling can help. Sojourner Counseling provides Christian counseling in Raleigh for children, teens, and adults who struggle in this area and more. We will take the time to know you and provide a tailored approach toward recovery. Contact us if you’re interested, and we will get you set up with an initial appointment.