How to Deal with the Idol of Control
Anything that takes the place of God in our life can become an idol, and this includes the Idol of Control. As Christians, we know that God is the One who is in control, but sometimes we take this burden onto ourselves. Why might we do this? Sometimes, we struggle with control issues because:
- We think being in control will improve our life.
- We think that we know what is best for other people.
- Being in control makes us feel more important.
- Lack of control can be scary.
Why is The Need to Control a Problem?
When we take what God is responsible for onto ourselves, we are sure to run into some problems. This is especially true when it comes to the need to be in control. For starters, it helps to remember our limitations. We don’t really know what is best, but God does. The last thing that we want to do is stand in His way. When we are bothered by control issues, then that is exactly what we are doing. As a result, we might find that we are:
- Often Anxious
- Critical of Ourselves and Others
- Unable to Trust People or Delegate Tasks
- Resistant to Authority
- Overly Perfectionistic
- Easily Upset When Things Don’t Go as Planned
Christian Counseling Can Help with Control Issues
If you are struggling with control issues, then Christian counseling can help! First, know that this is a common difficulty, and there are many reasons this can happen. Your Christian counselor will help you discover why you might be struggling with control, and you can embark on a freeing journey of letting go and finding freedom in God. This process can also include meditating on the ideas below.
Recognizing Control as an Illusion
Are any of us really in control? While we might want to be in control, the answer is no. There are going to be many things in life that we have absolutely no say in, ranging from minor irritations to major disasters.
Your Christian counselor can help you identify things that God has given you some measure of control over, while helping you let go of things that are out of your hands. Some of the things that we cannot control include:
- The Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions of Others
- The Unique Way that God Made Us and Others
- Past Choices and Consequences That We Regret
- What The Future Will Bring
- Whether Other People Will Like or Love Us
Surrendering Control to God
As difficult as it can be to surrender to God, this is an important step toward healing. Your Christian counselor will help you learn how to grow in your faith—knowing that God knows what is best, and He has your interest in mind. It’s also helpful to remember that all good things come from God, and we can’t really do anything without Him. This mindset of trust and humility can help you find peace, acceptance, and helps you refocus your energy into more productive matters.
Empowerment Through Self-Control
While we cannot control many things, there is one gift that God offers us, and this is self-control. If we focus more on cultivating self-control rather than controlling others, we can find that many of the things that cause us frustration are alleviated.
Exercising in self-control also helps us to become more reliant on God. For example, as we struggle against our sins and come to God for mercy, we realize just how much we need Him. This can also help us find more patience and compassion for others who fail to meet our own expectations.
Biblical Perspectives on Letting Go
Do you want to know what the bible says about surrendering control to God? Here are a few scriptural ideas that you might find helpful:
- God’s purposes for your life are good. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
- God cares about your worries. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God (Philippians 4:6).
- God will provide. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble” (Matthew 6:34).
- You cannot do anything without God. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing (John 15:5).
- Put God first, and everything else will follow. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33).
Christian Counseling in Raleigh, NC for Overcoming Control Issues
Dealing with control issues is no easy thing, but there are Christian therapists in Raleigh, NC who can help. Unpacking your need to take charge might be scary, but the process of letting go can be extremely freeing! Are you looking for “Christian counselors near me” who can help you overcome the Idol of Control? Reach out to Sojourner Counseling today!